Is life moving so fast that you are having a hard time keeping up with it?
Or does it seem like the days are running simultaneously, and it is difficult to track which day you did what, where, and when?
Some people have become dispassionate to life itself, and therefore have concluded that it is too late in the game of life to attempt to live one’s dream. Perhaps you feel as though your blunders were too frequent and your decisions were so disastrous that to recoup from them is out of the question. This kind of emotional despondency has a tendency to spill over into one’s marriage and job. It also has an effect on how you raise your children and deal with them on a daily basis.
If you live your days with unfulfilled aspirations, there is a natural inclination to capitulate to depression. Depression unveils itself as a disposition of defeat and thus shapes one’s mentality into that of a victim. There are steps you can take in order to alter your mentality of defeat and depression. You can deliberately reshape your mentality into that of a winner. Being a winner in life does not mean that you have escaped the trials and tribulations of life. It simply means that you have educated yourself on how to overcome the challenges in life and how not to allow them to weigh heavily on you mentally. There are steps you can take to better your journey in life while targeting more proficiently your goals and achieving them.
- Depend on God (will-power is inadequate for the task)
- Understand Purpose (to comprehend purpose can determine a favorable outcome)
- Become Highly Selective (right words spoken can lubricate life’s frictions)
- Control Your Mind (if you can control your thoughts, you can direct your life)
- Don’t Sweat It (major on the primary not on the inconsequential)
- Enjoy Life (life is an investment not a waste)
- Repeat Step One (start and end each day with trusting God)
Should these steps be executed sequentially in order to become a winner in life? No! Only steps one and seven are in succession or else everything else will be to no avail.
Most reasons given for divorce are simply byproducts of a deeper interpersonal deficiency – hypersensitivity to trivial matters. Most people are aware that divorce has become a common occurrence both in the United States and abroad. We are also aware that an estimated 50 percent of first marriages end in divorce in the United States.
According to statistics, second marriages fail at a rate of 60-67 percent; and third marriages fail at a rate of 73-74 percent.
Divorce statistics show that there are a number of reasons why marriages fail. On the other side of these reasons are a good number of reasons why marriages succeed. However, why do we love to narrow our sights in on the negative aspects, as though couples should spend the majority of their energy trying to prevent these reasons from affecting their marriage? When this happens, the debris of our struggles slowly eats away at all the good reasons for enjoying a successful marriage.
According to divorced couples, the number one reason that marriage fails is due to either a lack of communication or poor communication. There is a positive side to this negative scenario. Couples who are happily married report that they enjoy communicating with one another.
I do not claim to have all the answers for enjoying marital bliss; but I just happen to be the author of a book about marriage entitled, “msHow to Fix Your Marriage without using a Hammer.” I am also a clinical counselor certified by the State of California. This may mean absolutely nothing to you, but for what it’s worth, having over twenty years of experience helping people from rocky marriages to rocketing careers should account for something. In my previously mentioned book, I wrote about the solutions more than the problems. I figure this way, if you are busy doing what is required to have a good marriage, you will not have time to be concerned with what can destroy it. The dos will far outweigh the don’ts. People must be honest with themselves and with their spouses. Working on yourself is far easier than trying to fix your spouse. However, without exaggeration, most people are external when it comes to problems and finding solutions to those problems.
Scenario: Have you ever lost something and instinctively blamed someone else for it because the item was not where you thought you left it? If couples will look introspectively at themselves, they will not point the finger of blame at their spouses. Marriage can work, if you learn how to work it.
Join my FREE 1 Day Marriage Tune-Up on May 2 @ 1:00pm at the beautiful auditorium of Christian Joy Center in El Paso, Texas. If you are in town on this date come by and enjoy one of the most insightful afternoons of your life. It will be worth it!
Oftentimes, people are inundated with periodical headlines, advertising, and book titles, which all promise to expose the secrets or mysteries of the rich and famous, wealthy or successful.
- Are some people exposed to the age-old utopian of achievement?
- Is success so elusive that it is just too difficult for people to get their hands on it?
- If there are secrets to becoming wealthy or successful, what makes these wealth and success principles so secretive?
I do not believe that there are mysteries to experiencing success; I believe people know what to do, but they are too lazy to do them. Besides, success is how individuals may define and constitute success for themselves. People become preoccupied with making a living that they have forgotten that learning how to live is equally, if not more important than making a living. This is what we commonly call having a job.
Some people like their job while many others would love to do something else. However, many feel as though they are stuck in their nine to five without any hope of doing what they really would love to do. Wealthy or successful people would rather pay the price of doing what they love to do, then to be confined in trying to make a living. Vocation is far more important than occupation. Many people can start doing what they enjoy even though they are working a nine to five. They just have to start doing and they will discover their greatest joy is being fulfilled. If you would like to play it safe maintain your job while initially pursuing your dream, as long as the norm does not interfere, move forward. However, do not use your job as an excuse that hinders you from pursuing your life-long dream. So actually, what many consider a secret is not a mystery at all. If you do what others refuse to do, it places you in the upper echelon of life and practically guarantees you wealth and success. Living your dream is what millions would love to do, but instead they chose to rather make a living and complain about it. Success and wealth is in your hands to control, not in the hands of fate to decide.
I recently asked a series of questions to a group of people which could work as a gauge to facilitate each person in assessing how their personal limitations were determined. Oftentimes people play themselves cheap because of the defective information they have collected through the years that they have applied involuntarily on themselves. Certain words spoken by people who were influential in our lives, and the images and innuendos have served as a teacher that tutored us in the fine arts of negativity and “I can’t.”
When someone comes along and tries to pour into us words that are enlightening, creative and powerful, we will have a difficult time embracing them because these new words will challenge our present belief system. The things you believe you can do and the things you believe you can have in life are both based on the kind of information you received which developed a mental photograph of limitations.
What would be your response if a very wealthy person handed you a credit card and directed you to go and buy whatever your heart desired?” Let us be honest! Would you buy what you really wanted or would you be economical? Ninety-nine percent of those who were asked this question said they would probably not buy what they really desired.
Our excuses for being frugal would probably be, “I was not informed as to the credit card limit,” or “You never told me what I could buy.” The truth of the matter was that the person was properly informed of what they could both purchase and the limit of how much they could spend.
The problem was that what they heard was not what they believed. The person receiving the credit card, therefore, set their own limit without any assistance and purchased items based on their standard alone. Somehow, we will search for some way to shift our self-imposed limitations onto the person giving the credit card. However, despite how you may personally feel about your life, you have no more or less than what you have come to believe. You have exactly what you want in your world, no more and no less. Change what you believe, and you can change the size of your world.