Making This Year Your Best Year Yet!

Improve your life by discovering how to defeat your misfortunes. You can win!

When it comes to making improvements in your life, you cannot not take a laid-back approach to how you are going to make the necessary changes. Desperate times call for desperate measures. The mundane notion throughout the previous year produced little results but much frustration and disappointment. Most people like to start the New Year with resolutions that are seldom fulfilled. However, if you really want to make changes to your life by reducing your weight, making more money, or improving your marital relationship, you have to have a kick-butt attitude about it.

Live the Ultimate Life

Divorce yourself from self-defeating, destructive, non-producing results and escape from the ordinary. I must warn you though; that when you take a kick-butt approach to tackling the obstacles that try to slow down your progress by distracting you or to defeat your efforts with discouragement, it will cause you to stand out from all the ones whose attitude is mediocre. Living the ultimate life is not living a life of defeat.

Destroy Toxic Thinking

It is toxic thinking that causes people to think that it is okay to fall short of your goals; but in actuality, it is not all right. Why set goals with no intentions on reaching them. It is both a waste of time and energy to have such an absurd idea. Adjusting your thoughts is a prelude to changing your life. This is the first step one should make to access their dreams. You have to see yourself beating the odds, despite the opposition that is prepared to defend your present condition.

General MacArthur’s War Mentality

They say that war is hell because the rule of engagement is thrown completely out of the window when it comes to your enemy trying to kill you. The war mentality is kill or be killed. I admonish you, when it comes to fulfilling your New Year’s desire, take the ultimate, no holds barred, kick butt, and take no prisoners approach to accomplishing your goals this year.

One Couple’s Misfortune

I am reminded of a married couple in their early forties who became subject to this failing economy. After a pay reduction in his income and his wife losing her job to overseas competition they found themselves struggling to not only make ends meet, but to hold on to their most precious investment—their home. Falling seven months behind in mortgage payments, the mortgage company decided to delay the process no longer and they foreclosed on their property. At first, they were angry at the system and thought that they were without hope. I encouraged them to turn their anger into a drive to use this paradoxical system to work for them.

How to Subjugate Misfortune

Oftentimes, anger and resentment clouds ones vision and they are incapable of seeing opportunities that exist in misfortune. Remember, there is fortune in misfortune. As long as there is life in your lungs and fight in your spirit, you still have a chance to turn things around. Trusting the treasure God hid inside of you is imperative as you focus on your strengths. It does not matter when things are turned in your favor, it just matters that it happens. With this fortitude embedded in you to aggressively progress, you will attract the desires of your heart.

Misfortune Defeated

This couple fought back instead of taking it! They saw an opportunity to learn how to manage their money better; they started a small home business and negotiated with the mortgage company to change the foreclosure on their credit report. It took some time, but they made it work. Moreover, you can make your situation work for you instead of against you.

The Biggest Loser

Whatever you do, do not compare your situation to others. We all may have similar difficulties plaguing our lives, but they are not identical. When it comes to losing weight, do not measure your efforts against those on the Television Show, The Biggest Loser. These people have to commit to six months of grueling workouts of 6 to 8 hours a day and feed on foods prepared by expert dietitians. Your condition is quite different. You, in most cases, have to go to work and discipline yourself to maintain your individual workouts and eating expectations. Take a chill pill and calm down. You can lose all the weight you desire regardless of how many times you fail to accomplish your goals in the past. This time, your mental attitude is not as though you are trying to pump yourself up for a fight. On the contrary, your approach is “If you can create it, you can destroy it.” People please listen to me; if there is a recipe for disaster, there must be a formula for success. This year, see yourself beating life at its own game.

The Quiet Character of a Strong Woman

Women are remarkable! They have achieved their goals under some of the very difficult circumstances and so can you.

I have lived my life around some strong, remarkable women who have achieved their goals under some of the most difficult circumstances. Women have such a strong endurance when it comes to doing whatever they must in order to accomplish their goals. Especially when children are involved, women can rise to uncommon heights ready to not only defend their children, but also are willing and capable of mustering enough strength and wisdom to provide for their families.

First Self-made Female Millionaire

Madam C.J. Walker was such a prolific businesswoman who succeeded against the odds during a rather racial and violent time against African Americans. In 1904, after hearing Booker T. Washington speak, Sarah, which was her name before she took on the name Madam C.J. Walker, was inspired to go into business for herself. A few months later, Sarah perfects the recipe for her hair formula and she begins doing hair-straightening demonstrations with a hot steel comb that was given to her by one of her washing clients. Sarah’s business started to grow, with a steady stream of clients who wanted their hair straightened and a portion of her scalp formula, which she dished out in tin cups. Her ability to recognize a need, come up with a product and sell it to the masses was what made her the first Black woman millionaire.

A Great Private School

My lovely wife, Debra is one of those strong intelligent women who is presently living her dream of besides being married to me, but also running a preschool and academy. As a young woman, she matriculated from Hampton University with a degree in nursing while working hard to pay for her tuition. Afterward, she served eight years in the military as a nurse obtaining the rank of Captain. This is when she met me, the dream of her life and resigned her commission and started moving up the civilian medical administration ladder. She turned down a six-figure job and started the preschool and academy with just a dream and her faith in God. Despite my efforts of talking to her about delaying the process of establishing the school for six months, she convinced me that if not now, then when; and so we plowed ahead to establish one of the greatest private schools in our city.

The Most Influential Woman in the World

I cannot go any further without bringing into focus one of the most successful women of our time, Oprah Winfrey. She overcame the regret and shame of being raped and molested as if it was her fault, and personally grew to conquer a male dominated industry with her vision and gift in speaking. She crossed racial and gender barriers and became one of the top ten influential persons in America.

Mothers Influence

Down through the centuries, mothers have influenced the lives of their children far more than fathers have. I am not saying that fathers have not had an impact on the children, but mothers are far more nurturing than fathers are. When athletes are being interviewed they will usually say, “Hi Mom!” to the camera. Women have endured physical and verbal abuse, rape, low wages, and humiliation; and yet they rise. Most women know how to get up from failure and hurt after being knocked down by life’s circumstances.

My Mother’s Endurance

I learned to recognize personal strength by watching my mother who displayed an uncommon strength to fight through adversity and many disappointments. I have never seen my mother give up during financial distress or during periods of unemployment. While she was working at Western Electric and raising four active boys, she worked to find a better paying job. She did not even have a high school diploma; but she believed it was not going to stop her from providing for her four boys at the time. Later, she took a job at the U.S. Post Office and worked there until she retired.

A Life Lesson from my Mother

She instilled in us the little things that I see missing in today’s youth and in some adults. One day after I lost a bloody fight against a young boy, my mother threatened me that she would ware my tail (behind) out if I did not go back to school the following day and stand up against that boy. I had a new determination that this boy or any other boy will not beat me up the way this boy had. I have learned that when life pushes you, you push back harder. When your mother is tough like this, how could I expect to be any other way?

A Woman’s Value

Most men have learned some valuable lessons from their dads, but in most cases, men have gathered their strength from their mothers. The present age is experiencing a drop in the development of strong women. Young girls need real mentoring examples to connect and learn from because most of what they see today on television is nothing more than a façade. It is not about how much money you make or the career a woman may have that determines her worth. A person’s worth is in their birth. It is in the character of a person that exposes their standard and strength. A woman who refuses to compare herself to others will never compete. She knows who she is and she is comfortable in her own skin. She may have made mistakes early in life and no doubt will continue to make mistakes, but she gets up and pushes the reset button. Somehow, by the grace of God, her tenacity allows her to see those mistakes turned into miracles.

There is a Champion in You

There is a Champion that live inside of you. Discover how to unleash your inner Champion.

It’s your turn to rise up and live the kind of life that you were destined to live. Your real challenge in life is not the apparent competition of your opponent or your obvious temptation, which is simply your natural animalistic appetites that must be deliberately controlled, but rather to face yourself daily and measure yesterday’s passion for victory against today’s apathy. There will come a time in your life when what once came easy must be challenged by discovering new ways to muster up the desire and the passion to want to further develop your skills and/or character into something greater. The strength from yesterday is insufficient for tomorrow’s victory. Opposition is a natural part of life.

Failure is a part of Success

You must not be afraid to fail. Do not waste your energy trying to cover up failure. Learn from your failures and go on to the next challenge. It is okay to fail, but it is not okay to stay down on your back. If you are not experiencing some failure in life, you are not growing. The challenge of change is always hard. It is important that we begin to unpack those challenges confronting us and realize that we each have a role that requires us to change and become more responsible for shaping our own future. Although it is okay to fail, you should remember that failure is not natural, but it is necessary. Failure is simply an indication that you have not gone far enough, searched deep enough, stayed long enough or sacrificed all for the sake of discovering that unimaginable treasure within you.

DANGER: Comfort Zone Ahead

What often happens to people is that they easily settle into a zone of comfort because they believe that they have proven enough things to people. Many people successfully close their eyes to their personal defeats by concentrating on corporate battles. Therefore, their daunting task is unfinished because they fail to prove things to themselves. A comfort zone is an agreed upon limit which confronts you to stretch beyond it. Your mind will resist the challenge because your mind and body have gone into retirement. You will always know your limits because your comfort zone dictates it to you. You should never attempt to build a monument of your accomplishments when movement is still required of you.

Weakness Can Lead To Strength

One of the greatest strengths that a person can display is his or her vulnerability. Your susceptibility is not your prison but rather your freedom. You cannot climax while you have already climaxed. To display a weakness is necessary to capture your strength. In fact, it is impossible to be strong all the time or your enemy will easily out strategize you. Your weakness will cause your enemy to relax his defenses, which gives you a chance attack and win.

Be Careful & Pay Attention

Be careful of who you pay attention to when you are in the midst of a personal battle. The people who pretend that they have all the answers about what you should do, have no history of accomplishments. Their advice to you is simply to overcompensate for their own weakness and to mask their lack of character. You can rise up without their so-called-advice. Just because you are experiencing some problems in life, it is not an indication that you are doing something wrong. On the contrary, you are most likely doing something right. Rise up to the challenge and allow the champion in you to come forth.

Developing a Healthy Money Mentality

A healthy money mentality is the difference between the poor and the middle class, and the middle class and the wealthy. All three economic groups represent difference mind sets. Discover where you are and how to change it.

It is especially hard to work for money you have already spent on something you did not need. Money may not bring you happiness, but it enables you to look for it in more places. Moreover, money can bare a close resemblance to happiness. Now, please do not make the assumption that I love money, I just like it a lot. People who lie about how they feel about money will lie about other things as well.

Managing Your Money

Why is the subject of money important to me? I realize the mandate on my life to help people with a heavenly wisdom for financial increase in their lives. I am truly more interested in your success than your affection. Managing money usually requires more skill than it does with making it. It behooves people to work hard at becoming good money managers because you are the only one that will do it free for yourself. Wealthy people or people without money concerns think and act differently about money from those who are poor and middle-class. Wealthy people play the money game to win while other people play the money game not to lose.

Poor, Middle Class, and Wealthy Mind Sets

People with a poor money mentality play the survival and security game. The big goal of those with a poor money mentality is to have enough to pay their bills on time and pray for a miracle just to afford a vacation. A healthy money mentality steers you in the direction of learning ways to amass wealth. These people are committed to being prosperous while poor people want to be prosperous. Middle class people are committed to being comfortable so they achieve being comfortable relatively easy. If you are not totally committed to creating wealth, chances are you will not. Most Americans know exactly how it feels when your money is funny. However, there is nothing funny about not having enough money for your basic needs.

Changing Tracks

If you want to change your money condition, you have to change what you are doing. The information in your memory bank or subconscious mind is what channels you in the direction your life is moving. Your thoughts are the railroad tracks that your life travels. You move from one place to another and from position to position based on the kind of thoughts running through your mind. Your life can only move in the direction the tracks are going. Trains do not travel far without tracks. Give me five minutes in a person’s life and I can tell you if they are going to do anything significant with their life. If a person is not happy about their financial situation, he or she will do one or two things. They will either complain about it or shut up and do something about it.

Altering Your Mentality

Become passionate about changing your mentality about money. A healthy mentality about money is the beginning of understanding it. Wanting more of it does not mean that you are greedy; you are simply responding to a deep-seated desire of want. Without this natural drive “to want,” knowledge in any given area will no longer be pursued. It is this intrinsic quality that causes our eyes to search for images, our hands to reach for touch, our ears to stretch for sounds, our tongues to connect with taste and our minds to explore the vast universal for why. I strongly believe that a healthy money esteem transmute into a healthy self-esteem.

The Soldiers State of Mind

Do you think like a soldier? Their mindset is different from a non-military person’s. Discover how this mindset can help you to move forward.

There is a difference between being asked to do something and being commanded to do something. In the military, there is no such thing as being politely asked to do anything. Every verbal request is a direct order, to simply put it, a command. Non-military people do not understand the conditioning process that takes place while serving our country in the military.

Preparing for threats

I spent six years in the Army and three of those years were hardcore field exercises preparing us for any threat made against our country. I first heard of the word “Terrorist,” which is commonly used today while serving in Germany. I was on SD (Special Duty) for six months where I was the sergeant in charge of the Reactionary Force. I answered directly to a Lieutenant Colonel and I had only six men assigned to me to train and prepare for any terrorist attack in Germany, especially against the military installation I was assigned to during that six-month period.

Discipline & Structure

Military experience was a blessing for me because it taught me discipline and gave me structure for my life. These two specific attributes are very much needed when you are given live ammunition and sent out to defend your country. Although we never had to actually encounter these terrorists, we were issued live ammo and shipped out to defend the border against threats. It is at this time that you do not have time to ask questions or bail out and quit. You only have time to fall back on your prior training and preparedness and pray for the best outcome. You are not politely asked, as if you have a choice to whether or not you would like to leave your family. When you get a call from your superior officer early in the morning, you only have time to get dressed, kiss your spouse and children and pat your dog on the way out. If you can adjust to situations like this, knowing your life is about to be put up for auction, you can adjust almost to anything.

Mental Preparedness

Oftentimes, institutions such as large and medium size corporations, government agencies and even our modern military, overlook the necessity of being militarily prepared also includes being mentally prepared. General Douglas MacArthur said,

“Training distinguishes an army from an armed mob.”

To be mentally prepared is developing a mindset that constantly adjusts to backdrops and situations. A person’s skill level basically stays the same, but the milieu changes. This frame of mind increases the soldier’s percentage for survival, while on the battlefield, the streets of Chicago, or Wall Street. Being able to mentally adjust and adapt to your surrounding will make you successful in any field you dare to engage. I believe we can win against life’s challenges, but we must all learn from the Marines and “improvise, adapt, and overcome.”