Breaking The Cycle of Average

Breaking the cycle of average textHere is a line from the movie Sister Act II, starring Whoopi Goldberg, which served as a motivation for me to thrive in life; “If you want to be somebody, and you want go somewhere… you better wake up and pay attention.”

There is a very large class of people in society that you want to stay as far away from their influence as possible unless you want to be a part of them. Whether you heard of this group or not, the most important thing about this group is that you do not want to be a part of it. People in this group are not necessarily bad people, but if anyone from this group has your undivided attention, they may be a deterrent to your progress. This consortium of people is commonly known as ‘The Average 90.’ This is a group of people who may be stuck in a box without any desire or passion to break out of it. They avoid risk, abandon conflict, and run from any challenge that requires more than a mediocre effort.

Are you the kind of person who will give that little extra to achieve more than what the average person can accomplish? Average people live in the shadow of excellence—always admiring the achievements of others who are not as gifted, but apparently more daring. You don’t have to be the smartest or strongest person to achieve greatness. Have you noticed that the cleverest people in school are usually not those who are the most successful or who leave their mark on life? If you want to be better than what you presently are, you must do things differently or better than others whose standard is ‘just enough to get by’.

Aim beyond what you think you are capable of achieving. Challenge yourself to develop a total disregard for where your abilities end, and turn enthusiasm into the energy that moves you beyond your fears. Your future depends on many things, but mostly on you. You might succeed if nobody else believes in you, but you will never succeed if you don’t believe in yourself.

The difference between the average 90 and the uncommon 10 is that the average 90 will wait for opportunities to be exposed, while the uncommon 10 will create them. It takes perseverance to break away from the mediocre and to do something other than what most people are willing to do, which is to get a job…a job that pays them below their skill level. However, this person’s mindset may just be minimum wage. Isn’t it ironic that a person can be so talented and gifted, but their personal drive is like the power of a gas operated scooter and not that of a Ferrari.

Have you ever been at a point in life when you wanted to give up, throw in the towel, and quit for the rest of your life? Remember as children, when we played baseball and we failed to catch the ball, or being embarrassed at school for liking someone who didn’t like you? How about when you felt you were the most qualified for a position on your job but you were passed over because you just blended in? All of these, and more, real-life scenarios have been used as the culprit for quitting, or becoming stagnated, where you no longer gave a hundred percent effort.

Life is about always moving forward, no matter what—it’s not becoming stagnated by some emotional letdown like a child having a temper tantrum when something doesn’t work out the way you planned it. Finding excuses for quitting at life or giving up on your dream will give most people immediate access to depression and anxiety, which oftentimes, leads to self-destruction. However, those who have a resolve in their heart realize that quitting is not an option. Disappointments, frustrations, and failures, are all a part of life. Unfortunately, we cannot always escape these life factors, because while we are learning how to live, we are also learning how to succeed at whatever is before us. These life lessons inevitably lead to mistakes. How you deal with your errors will either demonstrate your mental stability and your inner strength, or the lack thereof.

For life to work in its most simplistic form, a person must understand that it takes wisdom to fast forward, intelligence to pause, integrity of strength to play, but foolishness to go backwards. If you can wrap your head around these for components, which can help in some way to make sense out of life, then you just might discover that the purpose of life really does make a lot of sense. You were not designed to be average.

No one comes into this world and begins life counting backwards by years, months, weeks, and days. All of humanity is designed for forward mobility, and we start, not at one, but at start. A person cannot set goals for the days they’ve already lived; they can only set goals for days that have not yet been lived. This suggests that there is a Mastermind and Designer who created us to live forward, not to die in backward mode.

Do yourself a favor and rid your mind of mediocrity. Examine your efforts, challenge your strength and intelligence, and take the limits of being average and throw it as far away from you as possible. Refuse to accept what life throws at you, like most people do, and throw at life what direction you believe God has designed you to go.

I understand that it is your life to do with as you please; however, it is not your right to make other people feel guilty because they don’t want to live their lives alongside yours. It is difficult to follow a parked car. If you are not going anywhere in life and your movement is synchronized with those who are average, can you please move out of the way so others can get by you without the possibility of tripping over you? If you want to waste your time, why would I want to give you the opportunity of wasting mine?

To break away from the norm you have been traveling, you have to move through the crowd of people to create your own path. People of destiny will make life happen; average people will wait for life to happen.

Jesus said, “If they compel you to go one mile, go two.”

Recommended Reading:

I frequently say, “Readers are leaders and leaders are readers.” I strongly believe this statement; therefore, I have taken the time to recommend reading material that I believe will greatly benefit your life and business endeavors. Click the images to see more information or to order the books from Amazon.com.

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Moving On Means Letting Go

let-it-go-postAre you at a place in life where you feel like your crutch is no longer available, and you’re finding it difficult to move on?

If you are going to move forward with your life after a disappointing divorce, a failed business, or a job that just doesn’t meet your personal expectations, you have to let it go. Your moving forward is only impeded by your past if you can’t let go of it. Some things are difficult to release if you still see them as options. If an old acquaintance still hangs around in your head, it’s because you haven’t released him or her from your heart.

Continue reading “Moving On Means Letting Go”

Always Forward

Always ForwardHave you ever been at a point in life when you wanted to give up, throw in the towel, and quit for the rest of your life? Remember as children, when we played baseball and we failed to catch the ball or, being embarrassed at school for liking someone who didn’t like you? How about when you felt you were the most qualified for a position on your job but you were passed over? All of these, and more real-life scenarios, have been used as the culprit for quitting, or becoming stagnated, where you no longer gave a hundred percent effort.

Life is about moving forward always, no matter what—and not becoming stagnated by some emotional letdown when something doesn’t work in your favor. Finding excuses for quitting at life gives a person immediate access to depression and anxiety, which oftentimes, leads to self-destruction. Disappointments, frustrations, and failures, are all a part of life. Unfortunately, we cannot always escape these life factors, because while we are learning how to live, we are also learning how not to fail. These life lessons inevitably lead to mistakes. How you deal with your errors will either demonstrate your mental stability and your inner strength, or the lack thereof.

How can people have an incredible childhood, come from an affluent family, attend the best schools and universities in the country, lack for nothing in their lives, and only to come to the conclusion they are unhappy? While another person, who lived the opposite lifestyle, experiencing bumps and bruises while growing up, coming from a lower to middle income family, who perhaps attended a local city college, and who struggles at times to make ends meet, discovers they are happy with their life. What’s the difference? How can two people who have lived a similar lifestyle of drugs and failure, turn out with one experiencing a mental breakdown, while the other experiences a breakthrough?

The answer may surprise you, because of how simple it is. Humans have a propensity to make simple processes extremely difficult. I have also been guilty of this in times past. I have racked my brain trying to understand some things that have challenged me, or to understand why I was not as progressive in life when I believed I was capable of being so; to understand those times when I should have been strengthening my decision making skills, to be more resolute, than indecisive.

I believe there are four major buttons in life, and not one of them, is a reset button. To reset means to return to a default setting. It may sound like a great cliché, but why anyone would want to return to the default setting which causes their mistakes initially, is beyond me.

These four major buttons are on every audio and video device, most computer keyboards, every remote control for these devices and every other electronic component requiring a play button: They are Stop, Rewind, Play, and Forward. In addition, eject is the added bonus. What do these buttons mean to the average person, who seems to oftentimes get the short end of the stick? Every person was born with a play, pause, and stop button. The reverse button, is only in a person’s head, because we cannot actually reverse except in our minds.

For life to work in its most simplistic form, a person must understand that it takes wisdom to fast forward, intelligence to pause, integrity of strength to play, but foolishness to go backwards. If you can wrap your head around these for components, which can help in some way to make sense out of life, then you just might discover that the purpose of life really does make a lot of sense.

No one comes into this world and begins life counting backwards in years, months, weeks, and days. All of humanity is designed for forward mobility, and we start, not at one, but at start. A person cannot set goals for the days they’ve already lived; they can only set goals for days that have not been lived. This suggest there is a Mastermind and Designer who created us to live forward, not to die in backward mode.

Don’t spend your days judging your future by the failures and disappointments of your past. And for heaven’s sake, do not spend your time trying to come up with an excuse to stop moving forward. Benjamin Franklin said, “He who makes excuses is seldom good for making anything else.”

Live life on purpose. Time is always moving forward. Stop spending your time living in rewind, because you are wasting it. Spend your time by paying attention to living your future today, and every new day, will expose you to new treasures.

Recommended Reading:

I frequently say, “Readers are leaders and leaders are readers.” I strongly believe this statement; therefore, I have taken the time to recommend reading material that I believe will greatly benefit your life and business endeavors. Click the images to see more information or to order the books from Amazon.com.

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Resolve Or Dissolve

resovle-post214
You either expand or you become expendable. You have to decide to live your passion or else it will be easy to become distracted? Have you committed to developing a winning strategy to cultivate greatness? No person can reach his or her full capacity without being committed to achieving it. Success should not be measured in terms of perfection, which can hardly be sustained, but rather by progress.

When your endeavors fail to attain a status of flawlessness, progress should be the expected outcome. Improvement is insignificant gain when your goals are enormous. Therefore, focus on realistic goals with their foundations settled in your passion, which is fueled by your inspiration. Avoid setting goals which are easily achievable. In fact, you should not set your expectations so far out of reach that you would need wings to get there.

Believable goals are far better than inconceivable ones. The evidence of commitment is what drives the athlete to perform at their personal best when they have to play extra endings of baseball, shoot one more basketball in overtime, or fight one more round when it appears they are losing the fight. You should not be overly concerned with winning by a landslide, just winning. Your aim should be to beat average, not succumb to it.

Being victorious in any area of life, whether by a large spread or an inch, is still winning. Let’s face it; there are no short cuts to success and it never goes on sale. Oftentimes, people want to achieve success at basement bargain prices without investing their time, energy, and resources. My friend, you must discover what is so personally valuable to you that it unleashes the fight in you. It must be that thing which makes you lose yourself in the moment of someone’s audacity to try to take it from you. You growl at the challenges, as a female dog will growl when strangers are trying to take her pups.

Regardless of how you hear others talk about how dreadful the economy is, the rising divorce rate, and the humongous loss of jobs, do not allow these individuals to weaken your defenses. Yes, negative occurrences are all around us, but it doesn’t mean they’re in us. You should not allow yourself to become contaminated with the misdirection of others and lose your dedication. Continue to fight for your dream of a wonderful marriage, a successful business, and a powerful and fulfilling life. If you can discover your passion in life, it will begin to spill over into other areas of your life.

How you view your circumstances and disappointments is important in determining to whether or not you will muster up the strength to go at it again. I cannot overemphasize the value of a failed attempt. That’s right; I said there is value in failure. How else can you learn to persevere if you never experience the kind of challenges which test your resolve and tenacity to fight, until accomplishment has been achieved? Discouragement is not fatal and failure is not final.

The more you fall short of your goals, the more you learn concerning what not to do. The reward of success is capitulated only to those who persevere over failure. Therefore, do not use failure as a reason to quit, but the motivation to go at it harder than before. Your failures can only make you smarter and privy to information you would not otherwise have accumulated.

All the rewards of life are beyond the comfort zone of convenience. Here is a remedy for being cantankerous and just plain irritable about life’s situations. Instead of trying to force yourself to pretend you are cheerful about the circumstances which are seemingly getting the best of you, take a real-life approach to fixing the whole matter. I discovered circumstances do not truly create moods; people do.

Your frame of mind is not preconditioned to circumstances, which cause your emotions to become erratic. People have simply learned over time to associate emotional responses with certain occurrences. Our thinking patterns are involuntarily forced into emotional responses based on the consistent images which suggest behavioral responses. It takes years of seeing these mental images which are conducive to producing reactionary responses without forethought. Therefore, it is not so simple to act as if you are happy about things falling apart in your life, which would normally cause an emotional shift.

Are you ready to hear how you can change your seemingly predisposed behavior? Count your blessings or they do not count! You might respond here with a resounding “What?!” I know you thought the remedy to controlling your emotional mood was a more complicated process. On the contrary, the answers to much of our problematic situations are discovered in simplicity.

Count Your Blessings. If you are only considering how bad your situation is, think of how much worse it could be. There are more things working in your favor than are working against you. When you begin to count your blessings, you will notice how the good far outweighs the bad. Therefore, thank God! Complaining about your circumstances will not fix them; it will only exacerbate them. If however, you count the good things which can come out of a bad situation; your emotional response will be favorable rather than negative. Try it; it works.

Recommended Reading:

I frequently say, “Readers are leaders and leaders are readers.” I strongly believe this statement; therefore, I have taken the time to recommend reading material that I believe will greatly benefit your life and business endeavors. Click the images to see more information or to order the books from Amazon.com.

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Why Do What You Always Wanted To Do?

wanted200When will you be ready to live the life you really believe you were destined to live? When will you finally decide to get up from your slumber and get on with the business of losing weight? When will you go back to school and get the college degree you always wanted to earn, or start that restaurant with your proven family recipes, or even open that merchandise store?


It is a travesty when I hear all the stories of people who found and used every excuse to avoid reaching for that one thing they always wanted to do. I can only imagine how it must feel to arrive at the end of your life, and realize how much you cheated yourself out of your best life. I say, I can only imagine because I decided over thirty years ago, I will only die once, but I get an opportunity daily to reach for my goals, to go to places others only dream of, and to enjoy the life I have. Why would I want to be stagnated by others whose only desire is for me to be as underachieving as they are?

I make no apologies for the amount of money I make, the best hotels I’ve stayed in, the cars I drive, the many books I’ve written, the famous and wealthy people I’ve met and spent time with, the amount of money I’ve given to religious charities, …the list goes on. And, I will continue doing these things and reaching for more until I have exhaled my last breath.

Why not go for it? Why not do all you believe God has placed in you to do? What are you afraid of? I believe one of the reasons why most people are so sad and unfulfilled is they have not figured out their happiness is attached to their purpose. I asked one middle age woman once, when do you feel you are at your happiest? To my surprise, she said when she is crocheting. When I looked at all the creative designs she has crocheted, I was amazed. In fact, I actually purchased several from her. I asked her if she ever thought of selling them since it could help her with the extra income she needed. She said she had only thought of giving them away. I replied, that sounds noble, but did you know the thing you love to do most is designed to feed you? Therefore, your labor of love is supposed to support you financially. She later took my advice, started selling her crocheted quilts, and averaged an additional $1400 a month in income.

Why stay miserable, settling for a life you know brings you no joy at all? Don’t give up on your dream because that would mean you’ve given up on life. You have so many awesome intrinsic qualities. Don’t sentence your life to a life of mediocrity because a few years have passed without you accomplishing anything worthwhile. Get up, and refuse to sit on a couch of ease. You shouldn’t want to stay in your house with your window shades down, blocking the sunlight; hoping someone will come by and spend some time with you in your misery. In case you haven’t noticed, you may be deliberately trying to make other people feel responsible for you making a decision to do nothing with your life.

I understand it is your life to do with as you please; however, it is not your right to make other people feel guilty because they don’t want to live their lives alongside yours. It is difficult to follow a parked car. If you are not going anywhere in life, can you please move out of the way so others can get by you without the threat of tripping over you? If you want to waste your time, why would I want to give you the opportunity of wasting mine? Stop suffocating your dream under the pillows of discouragement and disappointments. Both of these are a part of life. Haven’t you heard all success begins with failure? If you never give yourself the chance to fail, you will never reap the rewards of knowing how to get up again.

Let me tell you a story about John, a young man who really loved to run. John lived in a small town with a population of approximately 15,000 people, along with a couple of hogs and cows. John ran about three to four times a week. He didn’t do it simply to stay in shape; he did it because he loved it. At the ripe old age of 87 years, John decided to run the marathon hosted in a large city located about 220 miles away from where he lived. John first started entertaining the thought of running the marathon when he was about 55 years old, however, he was too busy making a living to take care of his family. He kept putting it off, and putting it off, although he would runs for miles for enjoyment. At seventy-five years old he decided he was going to enter the marathon, but his wife fell ill. Several years later, John’s wife died. John continued to walk and run for miles during the course of a week just to stay in shape.

One day, John’s only son came to visit him and told him about the marathon kicking off in two months. John thought for a moment and sighed, “I’m 87 years old; what can I do at my age?” “Dad, you are in better shape than most 40 year olds. Why don’t you go for it?! I took the liberty and signed you up.”, John’s son said. John said, “I always wanted to run a marathon, but I’m too old now and it will take too long for me to finish.” His son said, “Dad when I was only 10 years old, you taught me one of the greatest lessons of all, when you spoke to me about finishing last in a race.” You said, “it matters not how long it takes to finish what you’ve started, what matters is that you finish.”

So at 87 years old, John fulfilled his lifelong aspiration and ran and finished his first and only marathon. John died later that year with running shoes on his feet, as he sat on his porch in his chair, ready to run that evening. After running the marathon, John would hardly speak of anything else. John died doing what made him happy.

It matters not how long it takes to finish what you’ve started, what matters is that you finish.


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I frequently say, “Readers are leaders and leaders are readers.” I strongly believe this statement; therefore, I have taken the time to recommend reading material that I believe will greatly benefit your life and business endeavors. Click the images to see more information or to order the books from Amazon.com.

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The Strength of Perseverance

refuse-200 If I could give in a single word the missing ingredient that people seem to lack in their pursuit of excellence, or in reaching their goals or avoiding discouragement, it would be perseverance. To define perseverance in its most generic term, it would be described as the ability to ‘keep on keeping on.’ Most people have no idea as to how critical these words are to your success.


How do you continue doing the things that you have committed yourself to doing, when it seems to be no fruit production from your labor?  How do you continue doing something when you no longer like doing it?

This matter of perseverance is so critical to life that above all human traits, the perseverance characteristic should be built into the psyche and life of every child. The Greek word for perseverance literally means “staying power”.  The ability to remain focused under the pressure is the key while traveling on the road of success. If success is a journey than perseverance is the vehicle used. While you are traveling on any road, there will be some bumps (disappointments) and potholes (obstacles) in the road that you must learn to avoid.

It is easy to start the race with exuberance, but it is not so easy to finish.  Every marriage starts with the blissful thought of a couple being together forever, but today approximately 60 percent of them end up in Divorce Court. Every dreamer starts off with the idea that their business concept is the best on the market and that they are going to be on the fast-track to sell tons of their products, only to discover that they produced a ton, but only sold a few. If you think that life is a sprinters paradise, you are sadly mistaken. Life is a marathon; therefore, it should never be viewed as a 100-yard dash.

What happens with a marriage that ended in divorce? This question is easy; rather than preparing for 40 or even 60 years, which takes work, they thought that the marriage would take care of itself and so they made no preparations at all. This is why we have such great starters out from the gates, but very few ever make it to the finish line. They end up making some lame excuse so that they do not look bad in the eyes of their contemporaries. However, what does it matter what other people think when you yourself realize that you didn’t fail because you did not have the right stuff, you failed because you quit.

The opposite of perseverance is giving up. I personally know what it feels like to be in a dark place in life as if you are in a dark tunnel and that you have been traveling for days with no light in sight. It can be hard to concentrate when the darkness literally impedes your view. However, making the conscious decision to move forward is a matter of knowing what you want and how bad you want it. When you are faced with turbulent times is when your faith is tested, your resilience is stretched, and your toughness is brought into question. I know, I know…no one likes to be in this station in life, however, life goes on. What each person has to decide in a situation that seems to have no visible options is does the dream go on, does the marriage go on, or does the business go on.

If ten percent of the population controls wealth, then ninety percent might be scrubbing the bottom of the barrel. Most start up businesses, especially restaurants, fail with its first year, while others may have a window of two to four years. Why? Good question. To be willing to survive tough times, you have to be willing to learn. Learning is fundamental! You can learn a lot by what you go through, but you can learn a lot more by listening to others who outlasted the tough times you are presently experiencing.

Get inspired! Get turned on! Never, never quit because you will never get to see what the end will actually look like. Your dream is worth the fight, and so is your life. Hold on and keep on keeping on.


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Recommended Reading:

I frequently say, “Readers are leaders and leaders are readers.” I strongly believe this statement; therefore, I have taken the time to recommend reading material that I believe will greatly benefit your life and business endeavors. Click the images to see more information or to order the books from Amazon.com.

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How To Reach Your Potential

Reach Your Potential
Learning how to do something is not a mystery to solve; it is learning why you do something that is the key to discovering the secret that empowers you.

Have you ever stumbled into doing something by accident and later you could not figure out how you did it? People rarely ever stumble on why things are done because learning why takes a direct approach to determining a thing. If you discover the why, the how will come easily.

Continue reading “How To Reach Your Potential”

Is Your Past Your Future?

How you think reveals who you are. Are you a previewer or a reviewer? Discover you answer in the post.

I remember some time ago, a well-groomed young man in his early thirties came to me and asked for a minute of my time, and I said, “Sure, what can I do for you?” I was slightly skeptical, but also curious as to what he had to say. “I used to dream big until my business failed. I made too many mistakes and bad financial decisions to think that I could ever own a business again,” he said. My reply was, “Reflecting isn’t bad until you live there.”

Two Patterns of Thought

People have two basic forms of thinking patterns, one is constructive and the other is destructive. Melancholy people often live their life in review, too afraid to attempt new things because of their past failures. This form of thought pattern is destructive in nature because it demolishes hope. You will find this to be true with those who have been hurt in relationships, experienced divorce, or been disappointed with a business associate. Whenever a melancholy person initially becomes excited over a new business idea, they will put their life in review and recall the difficulties of starting and not succeeding in business. Therefore, after careful examination of their past failures, they will conclude that their ideas will never work. This person is often sad and depressed because the things they would love to do are reduced to his or her historical blunders.

The other form of thought pattern is constructive because it helps to build a healthy outlook on one’s life and personal future endeavors. These people often see things in preview. They would rather focus on tomorrow whether than presently live the regret of the disappointments of yesterday.

“When it comes to the future, there are three kinds of people: those who let it happen, those who make it happen, and those who wonder what happened.”
–John M. Richardson, Jr.

Where is Your Focus?

People who often succeed in living their life’s perspectives are those who learn from their past, focus on their present to develop for their future. This kind of person loves to get up in the morning because they look forward to doing something they have never attempted before. They do not live their entire lives trying not to rehearse the past, but rather preparing for the future. They are not familiar with living in the safety zone. In fact, the safety zone is very uncomfortable for them because it suppresses their creativity and locks them in a cavity of routines.

Are you the kind of person who often focuses on “what use to be” or one who loves to channel his or her life in the direction of “what ought to be?” Are you one who has to squeeze the worth out of living or value living because of its worth? Make your choice and decide today!
Charles F. Kettering once said,

“My interest is in the future because I am going to spend the rest of my life there”

If you are not concerned with your future, you are someone who has no clue where you are going. Allow your future perspective to be previewed instead of your past being constantly reviewed.