Breaking The Cycle of Average

Breaking the cycle of average textHere is a line from the movie Sister Act II, starring Whoopi Goldberg, which served as a motivation for me to thrive in life; “If you want to be somebody, and you want go somewhere… you better wake up and pay attention.”

There is a very large class of people in society that you want to stay as far away from their influence as possible unless you want to be a part of them. Whether you heard of this group or not, the most important thing about this group is that you do not want to be a part of it. People in this group are not necessarily bad people, but if anyone from this group has your undivided attention, they may be a deterrent to your progress. This consortium of people is commonly known as ‘The Average 90.’ This is a group of people who may be stuck in a box without any desire or passion to break out of it. They avoid risk, abandon conflict, and run from any challenge that requires more than a mediocre effort.

Are you the kind of person who will give that little extra to achieve more than what the average person can accomplish? Average people live in the shadow of excellence—always admiring the achievements of others who are not as gifted, but apparently more daring. You don’t have to be the smartest or strongest person to achieve greatness. Have you noticed that the cleverest people in school are usually not those who are the most successful or who leave their mark on life? If you want to be better than what you presently are, you must do things differently or better than others whose standard is ‘just enough to get by’.

Aim beyond what you think you are capable of achieving. Challenge yourself to develop a total disregard for where your abilities end, and turn enthusiasm into the energy that moves you beyond your fears. Your future depends on many things, but mostly on you. You might succeed if nobody else believes in you, but you will never succeed if you don’t believe in yourself.

The difference between the average 90 and the uncommon 10 is that the average 90 will wait for opportunities to be exposed, while the uncommon 10 will create them. It takes perseverance to break away from the mediocre and to do something other than what most people are willing to do, which is to get a job…a job that pays them below their skill level. However, this person’s mindset may just be minimum wage. Isn’t it ironic that a person can be so talented and gifted, but their personal drive is like the power of a gas operated scooter and not that of a Ferrari.

Have you ever been at a point in life when you wanted to give up, throw in the towel, and quit for the rest of your life? Remember as children, when we played baseball and we failed to catch the ball, or being embarrassed at school for liking someone who didn’t like you? How about when you felt you were the most qualified for a position on your job but you were passed over because you just blended in? All of these, and more, real-life scenarios have been used as the culprit for quitting, or becoming stagnated, where you no longer gave a hundred percent effort.

Life is about always moving forward, no matter what—it’s not becoming stagnated by some emotional letdown like a child having a temper tantrum when something doesn’t work out the way you planned it. Finding excuses for quitting at life or giving up on your dream will give most people immediate access to depression and anxiety, which oftentimes, leads to self-destruction. However, those who have a resolve in their heart realize that quitting is not an option. Disappointments, frustrations, and failures, are all a part of life. Unfortunately, we cannot always escape these life factors, because while we are learning how to live, we are also learning how to succeed at whatever is before us. These life lessons inevitably lead to mistakes. How you deal with your errors will either demonstrate your mental stability and your inner strength, or the lack thereof.

For life to work in its most simplistic form, a person must understand that it takes wisdom to fast forward, intelligence to pause, integrity of strength to play, but foolishness to go backwards. If you can wrap your head around these for components, which can help in some way to make sense out of life, then you just might discover that the purpose of life really does make a lot of sense. You were not designed to be average.

No one comes into this world and begins life counting backwards by years, months, weeks, and days. All of humanity is designed for forward mobility, and we start, not at one, but at start. A person cannot set goals for the days they’ve already lived; they can only set goals for days that have not yet been lived. This suggests that there is a Mastermind and Designer who created us to live forward, not to die in backward mode.

Do yourself a favor and rid your mind of mediocrity. Examine your efforts, challenge your strength and intelligence, and take the limits of being average and throw it as far away from you as possible. Refuse to accept what life throws at you, like most people do, and throw at life what direction you believe God has designed you to go.

I understand that it is your life to do with as you please; however, it is not your right to make other people feel guilty because they don’t want to live their lives alongside yours. It is difficult to follow a parked car. If you are not going anywhere in life and your movement is synchronized with those who are average, can you please move out of the way so others can get by you without the possibility of tripping over you? If you want to waste your time, why would I want to give you the opportunity of wasting mine?

To break away from the norm you have been traveling, you have to move through the crowd of people to create your own path. People of destiny will make life happen; average people will wait for life to happen.

Jesus said, “If they compel you to go one mile, go two.”

Recommended Reading:

I frequently say, “Readers are leaders and leaders are readers.” I strongly believe this statement; therefore, I have taken the time to recommend reading material that I believe will greatly benefit your life and business endeavors. Click the images to see more information or to order the books from Amazon.com.

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The materials are provided for your convenience and Dr. Brown will earn a small commission from Amazon when you purchase through the links provided above.

Come let’s talk some more about this, comment your thoughts below.

What We Have Is A Failure To Communicate

Communication1Does what you say matter more than how you say it? This is the age-old question that many people have concerning verbal communication. This dilemma seems to arrest people as they are trying to verbalize their feelings in order to get their point across. There is a huge discrepancy between the way people generally process the information they hear as opposed to the way they communicate their thoughts. Factors often exist when there is a breakdown in the communication process that are often overlooked such as culture, ethnicity, education, economics, a person’s mental condition, preferences, etc. These factors should not be undermined as though they are not important to proper communication. If a person desires to get their point across without causing a ruckus, it will prove to be a wise investment of time to learn communication skills. Especially if you are married, where most of your communication battles will occur, this is the ideal dialogue for you.

The Communicator’s Aim:
The person communicating should immediately take into account the aforementioned factors. This is not an assumption of one’s intelligence, but rather wisdom. The communicator’s aim should be to be understood. If a person attends any of my business conclaves, they can easily discern that I do not use big words to try to impress the people in attendance. My aim is not to impress, but to impress upon them the importance of the information given. I like to hold my audiences with my verbal skills not lose them.

Communication Problems in Marriage:
When married couples have communication problems, it is usually because they have established a non-verbal communication basis that they have not mastered. Assumptions are made because of previous misunderstanding and therefore instead of clearly communicating their thoughts to one another they give out singles that are rarely caught or understood. If you find yourself often saying, “I thought you meant…,” this response is an indication that you clearly have a communication problem.

A Communication Problem:
Some years back, there was a movie that Paul Newman starred in entitled, Cool Hand Luke. The character Paul Newman was playing was a rebel young man that often found himself in trouble with the law. He ended up in a back-woods prison surrounded by swamp and venomous snakes. The Warden would often inform the prisoners that if they tried to escape, they would both be recaptured and returned to be brutally beaten to serve as a reminder to not attempt to escape again or the swamp would kill them before they could escape to freedom. One day, Paul Newman’s character escaped, but was later captured and returned to the prison to resume his sentence. This is when the Warden spoke the famous phrase, “What we have here is a failure to communicate.” As a young man, I loved the phrase but I did not fully understand it until later in my years. What was meant was if you continue to do the opposite of what is spoken, obviously there is a misunderstanding.

Body Language Speaks Loudly:
Oftentimes, when words or phrases are misunderstood, it is usually because what is said may have a different meaning or connotation to the listener. The second reason for the possible misunderstanding could be, and in most cases is, when what is said does not correspond with the tone and facial expression when it was spoken. Therefore, the person may not have heard what you said because they were engulfed by how you said it. This is a major problem in marriage and sometimes in business board meetings. Identifying the problem is a third of the solution. However, knowing what to do with your new discovery is another part of the solution. Having the humility to place priority on the importance of getting and receiving an understanding, is far better and advantageous than gratifying your frustrations.

Clarification of a Solution:
Take your time, be patient, because the person you may be talking to, may have a legitimate hearing impairment. Communication is the basis to life. General simple verbiage gives you a far better percentage of being understood than speaking in an extra extensive vocabulary that may not impress anyone but you.

Recommended Reading:

I frequently say, “Readers are leaders and leaders are readers.” I strongly believe this statement; therefore, I have taken the time to recommend reading material that I believe will greatly benefit your life and business endeavors. Click the images to see more information or to order the books from Amazon.com.

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The materials are provided for your convenience and Dr. Brown will earn a small commission from Amazon when you purchase through the links provided above.

Come let’s talk some more about this, comment your thoughts below.

The Lesson Failure Taught Me

failure-lessons-200The disguise of failure can often deceive people into thinking that failure is actually fatal. When in fact, failure is not fatal, nor is success final.  
 

It is important to have a healthy perspective about life, success, and struggles, when one experiences failure, because of the frustration and disappointment often associated with it. However, failures are just lessons on how to get something done right; while at the same time, they increases your knowledge on what will not work. Some things that you may have thought were failures were actually successes. You may have looked at the things you’ve blown and felt like you made a complete donkey of yourself, but in actuality, those failures opened your eyes and made you a better person. 

Continue reading “The Lesson Failure Taught Me”

Produce Your Own Amazing Comeback: An Excerpt from Dr. Brown’s New Book MAXIMIZE YOURSELF (Coming Soon)

Success is going from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.
~Winston Churchill

comeback-185Winston Churchill’s quote may seem difficult and challenging, but the reality of life is that you are going to experience failure and disappointment in your life, and how you handle it will be the difference between success or permanent failure. The person who doesn’t make mistakes is unlikely to make anything.

Continue reading “Produce Your Own Amazing Comeback: An Excerpt from Dr. Brown’s New Book MAXIMIZE YOURSELF (Coming Soon)”

The Prerequisite for Mental Toughness

Mental Toughness
Mental Toughness
How do you think you would do in the area of exercising mental toughness?

It is easy to sit back and analyze another person’s performance, and say what you would do if you were in their situation. The truth of the matter is, if you have never been there or been trained for certain situations, you have no clue as to how you would respond under such severe mental pressure. Sometimes we are unable to change our environment to manage stress – this may be the case where we do not have the power to change a situation. Therefore, a person must learn to adapt and improvise in order to overcome the mental challenges and to have the best possible chance of succeeding. This is only accomplished with training.

Continue reading “The Prerequisite for Mental Toughness”

Managing Your Emotions (Pt 1)

Managing Your Emotion
One third of the American population admits to having some form of emotional problem. Limited ability to deal with one’s emotional instability has damaged businesses, careers and the personal lives of many people. The capability to manage emotions such as disillusionment, anger and frustration is an important interpersonal skill, which depends solely on your ability to identify and evaluate addictive behavior and its link to what incites it.

The ability to make exceptional critical decisions while experiencing highly emotional periods of frustration, disappointment, and possibly mild forms of depression, which can affect your future life or business, is usually predicated on the strength to manage your emotions. When your hopes in business are shattered by failure; or your first published book has not moved out of your garage; or your dream of succeeding in the music industry was shot down by some big-time music executive — allowing your emotions to get out of control, will easily cause you to become misdirected.

One of my business protégés once spoke out of his personal frustration because his company’s success was not coming as fast as he had anticipated. So, he made a ridiculous statement that he should just take his money and buy lottery tickets, thinking he will have a better chance at winning the lottery than being successful in business. You will be surprised how many of your business and personal life choices are made during times of stubbornness and inflexibility. Frustration and pigheadedness is a link to much of your anxiety that must be eliminated in order to reduce the severity of your problems.

“Whenever you’re confronted with a tough work situation, stop for a second and try to honestly answer this question: Am I approaching this emotionally or am I approaching this professionally?” –Suze Orman

Imagine you are a CEO of a company that has to answer to a board of twelve. One of the board members, (as if he is your worst nightmare) always shoots down your suggestions. Or, perhaps you are an accountant working in an accounting firm, where your boss thinks that you never have enough work. Your decision to remain cool, calm and collected under emotional pressure can be the difference of between success and failure.

If you are in any situation that is similar to these two previously stated scenarios, let me give you the simplest answer. Emotions are simply feelings in motion. If you can control your emotions, you can control the direction of your motion (action). Do not give your critics the satisfaction of seeing you as an emotional wreck.

Think about what you want to do, and how you want to act in a situation. Right action prevents poor reaction.

Recommended Reading:

I frequently say, “Readers are leaders and leaders are readers.” I strongly believe this statement; therefore, I have taken the time to recommend reading material that I believe will greatly benefit your life and business endeavors. Click the images to see more information or to order the books from Amazon.com.
[amazon_image id=”0091876508″ link=”true” target=”_blank” size=”medium” ]The Power of Focus: How to Hit Your Business, Personal and Financial Targets with Absolute[/amazon_image] [amazon_image id=”1930388179″ link=”true” target=”_blank” size=”medium” ]Unexpected Treasures[/amazon_image] [amazon_image id=”1930388128″ link=”true” target=”_blank” size=”medium” ]Developing a Champion Spirit — in just 10 minutes — For Women Only[/amazon_image] [amazon_image id=”193038811X” link=”true” target=”_blank” size=”medium” ]Developing A Champion Spirit – in just 10 minutes – for men only[/amazon_image]

The materials are provided for your convenience and Dr. Brown will earn a small commission from Amazon when you purchase through the links provided above.

UPDATED 06-17-11: Read the conclusion of this article, Go to “Managing your Emotions Pt. 2” now.