Four Steps To Help You Move On When Critics Want You To Stop

criticism-postOnce you make the decision to go all out and make something happen, all the components of various materials conspire to make it happen, and every naysayer and malicious person connives to block it from happening.


Opposition usually doesn’t rear its ugly head until a person is serious about achieving the goals of their life. Have you ever noticed those you were so were true friends, remained so, until you made a decision to move your life in a positive direction which did not include them? All of a sudden your so-called-friend was trying to sabotage your success by giving you every excuse they could think of, in hopes it would influence you not to continue in your personal pursuit of living your dream. They are discouragers not encouragers. The personal interest of this type of person is not to promote someone, but rather to secretly demote them in subtle ways.

I cannot recall a time when I was the brunt of a joke, as much as when I was twenty-three years old preparing to end my time of service in the United States Army. A group of constituents and close acquaintances came together to throw a farewell celebration for me. However, it turned out to be more like a Dean Martin Celebrity Roast Night. Some cracked jokes and laughed about my exiting the military. They laughed about me having no prospects for employment, and they sentenced my future to be as one receiving public assistance and eventually finding myself back in an Army uniform after my dreams had crashed. Nevertheless, they were wrong.

They were wrong for two reasons. One, I never had any doubt or apprehension concerning my decision to get out of the military;…and two, I did not set out to prove them wrong and to prove to them I could make it without big Uncle Sam watching over my shoulder. Sometimes, a joke can be a cover for how someone truly feels about you and the decision you are making with your life. With today’s cell phone technology, you can text a joke to a person about him or herself, and then put LOL on the end; and they may not ever catch the person’s true intent.

When a person makes every attempt to bring you down, it is because they are already beneath you. So, don’t get mad, get glad…because at least you have something for them to joke about. How else can they laugh? Their life is so miserable they need something to laugh about just to keep from crying.

Do you know what you want to do? You should never try to figure out who you are—you should be settled on that. A bird doesn’t try to be a cow and a horse doesn’t attempt to act like a dog. Their internal instincts cause them to habitually be what they are, just as your internal instincts should stir you into who you are. The problem that exists with human beings is most people are only interested in changing who they are to be accepted by their critics.

At the end of the day, be solidified on who you are and not on what others want you to be. Don’t lose sight of your personal desires just because someone does not want to see you succeed. Below are four steps for moving on when the voice of your critics seems to get louder each minute.

1. Don’t respond to your critics.
You know you are paying too much when you are paying attention to your critics.

2. Don’t give up on your dream.
You can stop your day job, but don’t stop your day-dream.

3. Don’t stop your perseverance.
Usually a person discontinues in their perseverance when they anticipate a problem before there is one.

4. Give no credence to how many times you didn’t succeed.
Instead of looking at one failure after another, you should have amnesia after each failure. You can survive by forgetting.

These four basic steps are all that is needed when you are pursuing your goal. Remember it takes little effort to bend over and pick up the fruit that has fallen from a tree, which in most cases, is already rotten. However, it takes pushing, believing, creativity, and stretching to get the best fruit from the top of the tree, which is usually the juiciest. Do you want to bend over for the rotten things in life which are the leftovers no one wants, or are you willing to fight for the best things in life which only a few ever strive to attain?

When you apply these four steps as you engage a non-constructive critic, you will eventually end up winning after losing their bad advice.

Recommended Reading:

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A Life That Inspires

inspire200Is your life an inspiration to others, or does your presence trigger perspiration in those you come in contact with?

It is important to understand the quality of life one may have does not necessarily translate into others seeing them as a quality person. A person of excellence and moral standards is inspiring to most people. Inspiration is derived from somebody or something that inspires someone to be creative in thought, or it is the quality of being stimulated to creative activity.


Have you ever visited a business establishment and asked the secretary or host a question, and they made you feel as though you were bothering them? Today, this seems to be the quality of service people are giving. For example, when I look at the quality of work at many construction sites, it is atrocious – to say the least. Even if the work is incomplete, the contractors want full payment for an incomplete job. What is worse, they do not care about the quality of work they have produced.

What is the quality of your work or business? Do you take pride in what you do? There is a restaurant my wife and I frequently visit, and I cannot ever recall going into their restroom and finding it dirty. Generally, if the restroom is filthy at an eating facility, the chances are pretty high the cooks and management have a low standard in terms of the quality of food and service they provide. In fact, this type of restaurant may not be a good place to eat, if you want to survive.

I happen to own a casual dining restaurant. One of the things I continually gauge is the cleanliness of our facility, ensuring a high level of service is maintained. The same principle applies to my house, church, and my own quality of work. My motto is, “In Pursuit of Excellence.”

While growing up in the sixties, there was a commercial about a Zenith product which has stayed with me to this day. Its slogan was, “The quality goes in before the name goes on.” The indication was that unless the product met the company’s quality standard, the product did not warrant the name of the company. They only wanted their name associated with a quality product. I certainly would not want my name associated with substandard work. Your work speaks volumes about you as a person. People should gain inspiration from your work and your life. Make sure you place the highest quality in your business, work, or services before you tag your name on either.

You cannot change other people, but you can change yourself. It is very easy to focus on the faults of others; but it is rather uncomfortable to confront your own. People are generally running from themselves, living in constant fear, and are apathetic about confronting the challenges which oppose their dreams. Isn’t it worth the battle to live the quality life others would be proud to? This is not a selfish, egotistical approach to living. To the contrary, this is no more than a person who wants a better life for him or herself and their loved ones.

Picasso, Michael Angelo, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., Aristotle, Corrie Ten Boom, Maya Angelou, Mother Teresa, Earvin ‘Magic’ Johnson, Oral Roberts, and of course there are more. These people and others in their class are an inspiration to people everywhere. Their lives and works speak loud and clear as to the excellence they portrayed during their lifetime. Though some have died, their names and their works still serve as an inspiration.

Are you included in this list of inspiring people? If not, you should want to inspire others so you can leave your mark on this world before you’re gone.

Recommended Reading:

I frequently say, “Readers are leaders and leaders are readers.” I strongly believe this statement; therefore, I have taken the time to recommend reading material that I believe will greatly benefit your life and business endeavors. Click the images to see more information or to order the books from Amazon.com.

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The materials are provided for your convenience and Dr. Brown will earn a small commission from Amazon when you purchase through the links provided above.

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What’s Right With You?

Gauge Yourself
Gauge Yourself
Have you ever been disturbed with your actions and said, “What’s wrong with me!?” Well, this is the usual response when a person is disappointed in their performance. When you know you could have done better, you shouldn’t downgrade yourself if your performance was not as good as your last. However, you should examine the degree of your effort. This is not a bad place to be, but rather a great disposition to exhibit. It is not how things turned out that caused your distress; it’s what you said after you saw the results. Instead of asking yourself what’s wrong with you, ask yourself what’s right with you.


You can be at a great station in life, and never recognize the blessing of being there when you are totally engaged with the result. How much are you giving in the effort, depends on the passion you have for what you doing.

If you have come up short after putting forth a mediocre effort, or you have attempted something without fully believing you could do it, the results were in your effort. This applies to careers, school, sports, and life in general. Your concern shouldn’t be mainly in the results after your effort, but rather at the end of the effort you put forth. To the onlooker, the results matters the most, but the effort ought to speak volumes to the person who exerts him or herself.

It’s all about the climb; the journey, the fight, and the exertion. The award is simply a trophy that you can place on your mantle, however, realizing the mental strength one discovers or the physical shape a person develops or the creativeness a person was able to unleash, is the reward that benefits the individual the most. The award is far less in value than the personal reward. The award is the result of the accolades of people, but the reward is the enjoyment of the exertion of overcoming the personal struggle to finish.

Think of all the things that are right with you and do not place a major focus on your negatives. The negatives can change into the positives as you change your perspective of them so that you will exert yourself with all fervor.

You have all the right things stuffed down inside of you; it’s just that sometimes your expectations don’t quite match up to your true ability. Oftentimes, this happens when we have a propensity to measure ourselves by someone else. You are designed as a beautiful specimen; a masterpiece. Why would you fractionally use your creative ability based on someone else’s ability? Get out of the comparing mode and stop competing with others. Why be concerned with how others may feel if you don’t quite hit the home run in life. What others may want from you is usually what they don’t expect out of themselves.

Be your own gauge! Whatever your field of expertise is, don’t prepare yourself based on what others may have achieved. Don’t even consider giving your best effort, which is usually predicated on just above minimum requirement. The idea of effectively becoming unattached from the results is emptying yourself during your effort. When you know you have nothing left in you after you have exerted yourself because of your passion, or love for whatever it is you do, your climb will be worth more than the accolades from others.

It always amazes me how most people are so preoccupied with the potential results when they have not even begun the effort. Before you begin anything, you should ask yourself, “Am I ready to be totally engaged in my effort to develop myself, or am I just interested in taking the shortcuts so that I can get a satisfactory result for little personal investment?” Your priority should not be the results, your priority should be the passion required to exert yourself to the max.

You cannot work it out until you out work yourself.


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Recommended Reading:

I frequently say, “Readers are leaders and leaders are readers.” I strongly believe this statement; therefore, I have taken the time to recommend reading material that I believe will greatly benefit your life and business endeavors. Click the images to see more information or to order the books from Amazon.com.

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The materials are provided for your convenience and Dr. Brown will earn a small commission from Amazon when you purchase through the links provided above.

Come let’s talk some more about this, commet your thoughts below.